Are they a result of having men problems? When I was dating a jerk awhile back I noticed that when I would come on my period I would get really bad cramps. Even when I was single and just 'playing the field' with a bunch of bad players, I would get horrible gut wrenching cramps. But now that I'm with someone I actually care about and who is good to me, my cramps have ceased to exist.
Could having really bad cramps during our time of the month be a sign that the relationships we're in are headed south or not in such a good place? Mmmm, I see a study happening in the foreseeable future............
Monday, February 1, 2010
Mistaken Interest........
Ladies, lets stop doing something. Lets stop mistaking sex for 'that thing' as Wale would so eloquently put it.
Single men and women view sex in entirely different ways. Single men view sex as a way to get off, bust a nut, and to feel good. Single women view sex as an emotional, physical connection. A way to possibly show a man that she's interested and even willing to give a part of herself just to show him.
If men and women understood each other a little better things would be a lot easier. We look at Cosmos "100 ways to capture his heart" (which more than likely includes various sex positions you can try out on him) and think that if we do some of the things on that list we'll win him over.
WRONG.
Men are simple creatures. One of the sure fire ways to win a mans heart is to connect with him on a level that's deeper than sex- mentally. You ever notice that when you first meet a guy everything is great but after about a week or two things end up leading to sex? It's because that man has become bored with the mental aspect of the relationship and is now moving on towards the sexual aspect.
A mans mind prefers to be stimulated on multiple different levels. Many women fail to realize this and think that having sex with a man will keep him around. Especially if she's 'throwing it back' right and doing all of the freaky nasty shit he likes.
Think about it: If you're looking for a husband or someone you can start a relationship with, don't you think that being able to connect with that person on a deeper level is necessary? I mean, it would get boring after awhile if there's no mental connection. Yes, you could fuck his brains out but then what?
This theory goes back to the saying that 'love becomes deeper than looks'. A man or woman can be one of the sexiest people on the planet and can dress his or her ass off but outer appearance alone wouldn't be enough to keep someone in a relationship.
Read books, educate yourself, and learn to communicate on a variety of different levels. And if a man is still only worried about getting into your pants then you know he's not truly interested in you but more interested in seeing what your pussy's like (Period).
Move on, and find someone more interested in you and not whats in between your legs.
Single men and women view sex in entirely different ways. Single men view sex as a way to get off, bust a nut, and to feel good. Single women view sex as an emotional, physical connection. A way to possibly show a man that she's interested and even willing to give a part of herself just to show him.
If men and women understood each other a little better things would be a lot easier. We look at Cosmos "100 ways to capture his heart" (which more than likely includes various sex positions you can try out on him) and think that if we do some of the things on that list we'll win him over.
WRONG.
Men are simple creatures. One of the sure fire ways to win a mans heart is to connect with him on a level that's deeper than sex- mentally. You ever notice that when you first meet a guy everything is great but after about a week or two things end up leading to sex? It's because that man has become bored with the mental aspect of the relationship and is now moving on towards the sexual aspect.
A mans mind prefers to be stimulated on multiple different levels. Many women fail to realize this and think that having sex with a man will keep him around. Especially if she's 'throwing it back' right and doing all of the freaky nasty shit he likes.
Think about it: If you're looking for a husband or someone you can start a relationship with, don't you think that being able to connect with that person on a deeper level is necessary? I mean, it would get boring after awhile if there's no mental connection. Yes, you could fuck his brains out but then what?
This theory goes back to the saying that 'love becomes deeper than looks'. A man or woman can be one of the sexiest people on the planet and can dress his or her ass off but outer appearance alone wouldn't be enough to keep someone in a relationship.
Read books, educate yourself, and learn to communicate on a variety of different levels. And if a man is still only worried about getting into your pants then you know he's not truly interested in you but more interested in seeing what your pussy's like (Period).
Move on, and find someone more interested in you and not whats in between your legs.
When Love Finds You
What do you do?
You meet a great guy who is everything you've ever wanted in life. Smart, kind, respectful, and handsome. Yet you can't seem to get over your past and accept what has come in to your future.........
I've been hurt in the past before by a guy who I thought I was in love with. I was used, abused, and disrespected beyond belief. And as a result, I began to view all guys the same way- disrespectful dogs. So when I found my significant other I viewed him like my past. I wouldn't give him the time of day. I liked him yes but I had this mindset that I was never going to get close to another guy again. I put my guard up. Did and said things so that he wouldn't get close to me that way- I wouldn't get close to him.
But then I realized: he genuinely cared.
He genuinely cared so much that he tried his hardest to prove to me that he wasn't like the rest. That he was different and wanted to show me that I was the one for him.
Ladies, if a man truly cares about you and sees that you have a guard up because you've been hurt in the past, he will do everything in his power to show you that he's not going to hurt you- that he wants to be there for you and with you. Actions speak louder than words so listening to a guy tell you "I'm not like those other guys" is bullshit. Let him prove to you that he's "not like those other guys" through his actions. Let him show you that you are the one he wants to be with. And let him give you his heart.
Its hard to tell. So many are so deceiving but you'll know. You'll know by his actions. If a guy is doing something that is leery, let that action speak for the type of guy he is.......
You meet a great guy who is everything you've ever wanted in life. Smart, kind, respectful, and handsome. Yet you can't seem to get over your past and accept what has come in to your future.........
I've been hurt in the past before by a guy who I thought I was in love with. I was used, abused, and disrespected beyond belief. And as a result, I began to view all guys the same way- disrespectful dogs. So when I found my significant other I viewed him like my past. I wouldn't give him the time of day. I liked him yes but I had this mindset that I was never going to get close to another guy again. I put my guard up. Did and said things so that he wouldn't get close to me that way- I wouldn't get close to him.
But then I realized: he genuinely cared.
He genuinely cared so much that he tried his hardest to prove to me that he wasn't like the rest. That he was different and wanted to show me that I was the one for him.
Ladies, if a man truly cares about you and sees that you have a guard up because you've been hurt in the past, he will do everything in his power to show you that he's not going to hurt you- that he wants to be there for you and with you. Actions speak louder than words so listening to a guy tell you "I'm not like those other guys" is bullshit. Let him prove to you that he's "not like those other guys" through his actions. Let him show you that you are the one he wants to be with. And let him give you his heart.
Its hard to tell. So many are so deceiving but you'll know. You'll know by his actions. If a guy is doing something that is leery, let that action speak for the type of guy he is.......
When the Faith Seems Gone...
I try my hardest to have faith in whatever I do in life. Lets face it, faith is comforting. Knowing that there is a higher being that is looking over us is encouraging- well, at least it is for me.......or was.
I was super excited about possibly starting a new job. I went in for a group interview, got a call exactly two hours later to come back in for a second interview and what do you know, I didn't get the job. Mind you, I had had my faith the entire time. Faith that God would help. Faith that God would realize how desperate I was for a permanent position where I could began my career. Faith that he would realize how much of a failure I felt I was.........
But my faith failed me. It made me think that perhaps.......just maybe faith no longer existed.
I try my best to be a good person and although I have made countless mistakes in my past, I have tried to come up from that and make the best out of my current predicament.
Why does it seem like God rewards those who do bad things? Coming from a religious standpoint (because I know there are millions of people who believe in other things which is fine :)) but why does it seem like the ones who don't deserve receive?
My faith has dwindled and I no longer feel like the faith I had was real. I no longer feel like there is someone watching over me and looking out for my best interest.
My faith seems gone.........
I was super excited about possibly starting a new job. I went in for a group interview, got a call exactly two hours later to come back in for a second interview and what do you know, I didn't get the job. Mind you, I had had my faith the entire time. Faith that God would help. Faith that God would realize how desperate I was for a permanent position where I could began my career. Faith that he would realize how much of a failure I felt I was.........
But my faith failed me. It made me think that perhaps.......just maybe faith no longer existed.
I try my best to be a good person and although I have made countless mistakes in my past, I have tried to come up from that and make the best out of my current predicament.
Why does it seem like God rewards those who do bad things? Coming from a religious standpoint (because I know there are millions of people who believe in other things which is fine :)) but why does it seem like the ones who don't deserve receive?
My faith has dwindled and I no longer feel like the faith I had was real. I no longer feel like there is someone watching over me and looking out for my best interest.
My faith seems gone.........
The Pursuit of Happiness anyone?
Have you ever sat down and truly thought about life? Have you ever felt sorrow, pain, disappointment, discouragement, guilt, humility? The list could go on. The happiest people are secretly the most miserable. But why? Life is tricky and full of surprises. You never really know about a persons 'real' life because rather we want to believe it or not we are all one way with our friends and family and a completely different way when we are alone. Some of us feel like failures, and are angry and depressed.
But how can we attain that level of happiness that we all strive to get to? How can we get to the point we're we wake up every day with a smile? Its hard. Would money make us happy? A significant other to love? Peace? A family? A great career? Friends? A new car? A college degree? Who knows. But one thing for sure is that we all experience that one moment of genuine happiness at random points in our lives but unfortunately it often doesn't last long.
But how can we attain that level of happiness that we all strive to get to? How can we get to the point we're we wake up every day with a smile? Its hard. Would money make us happy? A significant other to love? Peace? A family? A great career? Friends? A new car? A college degree? Who knows. But one thing for sure is that we all experience that one moment of genuine happiness at random points in our lives but unfortunately it often doesn't last long.
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